Why this question

We are constantly making judgments about other people. We read a look, hear a phrase, notice a choice, and begin assembling a story about what it means. Often we have to. Discernment is part of moving through the world wisely.

But the stories we tell can quickly become more certain than the evidence beneath them. We fill in motives we cannot see. We interpret someone’s worst moment as evidence of who they are. We decide what kind of person would think, vote, believe, say, or do such a thing, and then respond to the person we have imagined.

Assuming the best can interrupt that reflex. It can create room for curiosity, generosity, and correction. But charity has limits too. Sometimes the evidence matters. Sometimes trust has been earned or broken. Sometimes refusing to see clearly is not kindness at all.

The harder question is how to remain generous without becoming gullible, and discerning without becoming cynical.

The question

When is assuming the best about someone wise, and when is it naive?

One more question worth carrying

What if we’re wrong about them?